Jodian Pantry: He dragged me in the Restroom as they Secured the TURF :( (Story of my Life Continues Part 3)
Bwoy, fear is a ugly ting eh nuh, i believe fear comes from the DEVIL!!, because most of my youthful days were spent in fear. Fear of what? Fear of what others views were of me. Oh how i wish i was smarter in 2002, because "LORD" i would have but all my trust in noone else but you!!!.
So, i ran away from home. It was a Friday afternoon school had just dismissed, and i head straight for the gate, and oh did i ever mention, i hardly got good grades in Glenmuir High School, smh, maaan i was treated like a dumb kid, thats exactly how most of the teachers and students at the school viewed me. I was treated like the "E' student, because most times that was what my report cards said. I can never forget, (stay with me guys the run away drama is still to come) but i never forget that morning in class devotion held at the back of Form 4L, and a particular teacher was speaking that morning about school students enrolled in the school, and she stared me down throughout her little" Drop Word" talk that morning. Great!! i said in my head, now the whole school knows i am a dunce, and she was referring to me, well i thought i was a dunce. So the lame chat ended and i head on off to my first class and it was MATH!!.
Sweet Jesus, could someone just pronounce me dead already!, i had the teacher who was always at me, she knew how horrible at math i was, yet she would come down on me so hard. These were her words as i head straight to the chalk board to solve the maths puzzle. "Likkle gyal, why yuh suh dunks" (Dunce) as i couldnt solve the puzzle at all, as i was never ever taught how to do it, since whenever i asked for her assistance or from my so called friends, sigh, it never really happened. Students were on the floor impregnated with laughter, tears decided to flow.
So that special afternoon came and i never needed my HOME, SCHOOL or Singing any more, it was 7pm in the night, i was MISSING. While i was missing, i can remember i crossed over a river in a place called Morgans Pass in Clarendon, and i wandered off in dangerous, sharp edges debris, this is in the night am talking about. I found a tree, sat down buried my head between my knees and i cried, i was cold. I could hear lots of sirens from afar. I wonder whats happening i thought, what if bad men escaped in these very bushes i am in i thought, and the cops are looking for them, that was when i started walking towards LIFE again, little did i know the sirens were meant for me, as a search was going on.
I missed my mother and thought i was cruel to make her worry so much, cry so much, i had a cell phone with me at the time but it was off. The power lights came on, i had several missed calls. Most of them from my Mother and a few from a little boy crush friend i had at the time lol. His messages were awfully serious. I can remember he said your mother came to my house asking me if i saw you today, i told her no, but she didn't believe me, you have police questioning me, he said Jody, please go home your mother is worried about
you, i replied, SW,i am almost home.
As i approached Chapelton town there was this crowd around my Mother , i jumped from the bus sad, weak, afraid, and crying. I was prepared for that beating, i was prepared for a buff chest hahahaa,oooh man, smh, i was prepared for my punishment. But to my surprise, she hugged me so tight, my skinny bones cracked literally, it was as if i disappeared for years!!, she rubbed my face, she kissed me, she asked where did you go? I replied. Momma i am a dunce, nobody likes me, i am everybody's fool, i am weak, i am ugly, my eyes are too black, they plot against me at school, they lie on me, they stone our house, no matter how i study to pass my tests and exams i always fail in everything, and i wailed and wailed. I complained and complained, so that's why you run away from Mommy?, from your family, even your brother is crying for you. I told her sorry, we went home she grabbed the bible, grabbed the consecrated Olive Oil, she started praying over me.
My life continued, i soon came to my senses and realized that somehow, someday, some way, i will have to be the real me, no more Plastic.
Being the real me took some time, being fearless was never easily achieved either, as i still needed to be more assertive, i needed more courageousness, boldness. I was still afraid, i had no idea on how to defend myself when i was left alone to face the music, when it was stupidity that always land me in the guidance counsellors office at all times. That girl was something else, she thought she was better than i was, more truthful than i was, she was admired, she had long hair, high forehead, in many eyes, she was innocent, i called her my friend yet she always painted the Letter L, for LIE, on me in unfortunate circumstances. And the guidance Counsellor would always believe, well at that time it seemed like it.
When i thought things could not get any worse, it did. It was Physical Education day on a cool, calm, i remember, Wednesday it was. I was not feeling so well that day, so i needed to see the nurse, towards her turf was an Alley, very narrow and a bit dark, with a door that lead towards the School Boy Footballers dorms, then on the right was the females restrooms. They would always hang around in that alley, sweet talking the attractive females only, a known secret lovers spot by the way. There was one specific stalker i could not rid myself of. this guy had no ambition!! I was a dunce, I hardly spoke, I was not liked, so why even bother to get my attention. Clueless very much i was. Had no idea he had things plotted in his head against me. I approached the girls restroom, i realized the place was too silent, they guys there were too still, so i made my way quickly, then suddenly, a hand reached for me from the girls restroom, i was dragged into the restroom, it was my stalker. Heart attack is not the word to describe how frightened i was, not to mention that part when the ballers on the outside of the alley locked the grill, and kept their eyes open, and guarded the turf like security guards. I tussled, his hand reached over my mouth, i was held from behind, he used his right arm to make way beneath my uniform.......................................READ PART 2 HEREREAD PART 4